Tina Fetner, on the actions required to get a US Passport renewed at the US Consulate in Canada:

We submitted our paperwork, paid the fee, and then Husband and I were required to raise our right hands to swear an oath that Kid was ours and that all the information we provided was true and correct. Seriously, we were asked to raise our right hands. It was like Durkheim and Weber got Goffman on a conference call to brainstorm the ideal way to use ritual to legitimate your bureaucratic authority.

Oh, snap!